‘Everything about her is perfect… except for one thing’

« I recently met this girl on Hinge [a dating app], and needless to say, she’s just about the best person I’ve ever met on there, » Martin shared on Reddit.

« I actually feel like I can talk to her, and she cares about what I say. We have similar ideals and values, and both really want to start a family. »

Martin feels really guilty for saying this, but there’s one thing that is making him feel hesitant about his new romantic connection.

« She’s not exactly the most… fit person, » Martin said. « She’s pretty and, frankly, I think would be beautiful if she lost about 150lbs [just over 10 stone]. »

Having recently dropped 100lbs himself, Martin now fears he « might not be attracted to her » because of her weight.

« I’m not particularly unattractive, » Martin said about himself. « I just have a nagging scariness that I might not be attracted to her, which I feel is an extremely petty thing to say. »

He insisted: « To be clear, I never would give her the ultimatum to ‘either lose weight or I leave’. »

Martin asked the Reddit community: « Would [her weight] be a reasonable deal breaker for you? »

While certain users of the social forum protested that he would have seen what she looks like on the app before meeting up in the first place, Martin hit back.

« Most of her pictures were from a time when she was thinner, » Martin insisted. « So I wasn’t aware of the extent of the situation. »

Admitting he feels an emotional connection, he’s not sure if his romantic feelings for her will progress. « That’s what has me so conflicted, » he said.

In response to his query, Fluffy_assasins said: « Would you want to be with someone who didn’t like a part of you? She doesn’t want this kind of relationship. No one does. Move on. »

FolkloreLover22 emphasised: « Don’t date people you are not attracted to. »

The SaltRose stated: « Then you aren’t interested in her as a person. Take her as she is or let her go. »

In agreement, FatSadHappy said: « This is the same if a girl said, ‘I like a guy if he would earn 50k more’ or ‘I like a guy if he would be four inches taller’.

« She is who she is. She knows her weight and if she keeps it – she has a reason for it. So either like her as a package now or move on. »

Beea91 wrote: « You like what you like. Physical attraction can’t be forced. If you’re not attracted, then you’re not.

« Mental and emotional attraction can definitely be built upon and sometimes once you’re so emotionally invested in a person, you can get used to the way a person looks. But if they’re not attractive to you, then they’re not. »

*Name has been changed.